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Nothing for Christmas (Duchess Lucinda's version) by: MysteryGirl

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In this song (written as a holiday treat), the penguins find embarrassing "baby-pictures" of Duchess Lucinda stored in the basement of the halfway house... dating back four years ago. One of those was a video of her first official Christmas, in which her stocking was full of the same black rocks she and her brother had been pelted with last year (the "terrible-two's" of lemur development). Amy, a seven-year-old at the time, knew enough to explain the coal: those who get on the "nice list" (the VIP of sorts) get the toys and gifts they earned by sharing and caring, while the "black rocks" are given to those who annoy (if not just disappoint) Santa Claus by being greedy and disrespectful, thus ending up on the "naughty list" (Santa's version of the "absolutely-not-a-guest" list... at least as Julien learned at a much later time)! Most of the video is filmed with Duchess Lucinda, a "toddler" at the time, wallowing in her dark-and-dirty rock-pile of shame, singing and pondering what she had done to get in this mess, all while little Amy tries to give encouragement:

I tossed stink-fruit, there's no doubt
somebody told on me!
I "turned the bathroom inside out"
how did he know that's me?

My you-know-what's on the "welcome" rug
I made Roger eat a bug
ruined Zeke's ice-cream when I dug
who could've told on me?!

I'm getting nothing for Christmas,
no wonder, Santa is mad!
I'm getting nothing for Christmas
'cause this girl was nothing but bad!

I used to pull my brother's tail
Bet he has told on me.
I fibbed to Pappy, said I caught a whale
ne'er thought that would haunt me!
I blew up the living room last month
pulled pranks, even when told "that's enough!"
picked fights for fun, and at least I'm tough
but these are too much for me!
Oh!
I've gotten nothing for Christmas
if mom and dad lived, they'd be sad!
I gotten nothing for Christmas
and I bet my twin wasn't this bad!
I disappointed Santa Claus
who cares who snitched on me?!
My gift-bag's full of rocks because
it serves me right, you see.
(Little Amy): Next year things will be set straight
I'll help you to be good, just wait
(Little Lucinda):I might start now, but it's too late:
'cause there's not one gift for me!
Yes I've gotten nothing for Christmas
except all this "coal"... maybe sand!
Still think I'll be good next Christmas?
I'm so used to being spoiled and bad!
(Little Amy): Just cross-your heart on a vow you shouldn't break
that you won't repeat this big mistake...
(Little Lucinda): ... I won't end up with black rocks for Christmas!




END OF ARTICLE

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